In the wake of the Bill Cosby
scandal, rapper Tyga has been in the media recently for DMing fourteen-year-old aspiring singer O’Malia. Ok
Magazine released an article discussing in high detail the conversations that
were had between the young girl and the 25-year- old rapper. Tyga has denied the
allegations, claiming the messages were about her musical talents, and O’Malia
is telling the media (with her attorney present) that he tried to pursue a more
intimate relationship with her. This is not difficult to believe since it was
once rumored that he was dating seventeen-year-old Kylie Jenner, only owning up
to their relationship in the media once she turned eighteen. They often told
the media that he was just a friend, however their followers Instagram,
Twitter, and especially Snapchat saw a more intimate relationship between the
two.
When I saw the video of the girl in
question, I noted that she looked older than her age. She was a taller, blonde
girl, and very pretty. I noted that this girl looked older than her age, much
like Kylie Jenner, however, she donned jeans and a sweatshirt, not the make up
and clothes Kylie would be wearing at her seventeen years. I noted these things
because I know every pedophile has a type. Some don’t always like little kids,
some go after impressionable teens. However,
other people noted these traits and as I looked below the video to see who
shared it, I noticed a friend of mine commenting that he didn’t believe she was
fourteen. Someone else commented that they would consider her to be at least
seventeen. Being me, I commented that I believed he was a pedophile. And this
is a constant battle in the black community.
All communities have a group of naysayers
who victim blame-and-shame. It is everywhere and its one of my goals to stop
it. But in the black community, we have a unique way of displaying it, just
like other groups and cultures have a way to show theirs. We look at our
daughters who are more developed than other girls of our race and of others and
consider them to be “too grown,” especially if they entertain the male
attention. Being fourteen and looking “grown” doesn’t equate to being, thinking
and acting grown. Many of the girls aren’t making sense of the situations they
are in when they are with predators, sometimes relishing in the attention
because they don’t understand how bad is. Some are suffering it alone (or even
hiding it because they like the attention), while others are generally trying
to ignore the unwanted male attention they receive because they go through it
most days while walking down the street or in the comforts of their own home
with “friends” and “family”.
Me at 14 years old. Its not hard to "confuse" my age. |
Being a young girl from the city, I
can count the amount of grown men that would stop me on the street and not care
when I told them my real age. My first encounter happened when I was ten and
the guy was fifteen. Though we were both underage, we were in two different
“life brackets.” Like him and many others, they didn’t care. The noticed every
thing about my body and my face, that looked more “seventeen than fourteen”, so
they didn’t care about the consequences. Girls like this, the ones who are
built like grown women earned terms such as “jailbait” and “heartbreaker” in
the hood because they were untouchable and “risky if touched” but there were
never nicknames for the men who dared the risk.
In our community we don’t
acknowledge this as what it is. We see the young girls and assume that since
they are not being dragged and forced, that they are willing participants.
Never once do we question the fact that these women are impressionable and
young. We even look and assume that because she is a girl, she is smarter and
more advanced than the men, therefore she should know better. But it seems we
never try to save her from the pedophile or even call it something as bad as
that. We saw Tyga and Kylie, and blamed Kylie and Kris Jenner for allowing it
to happen, barely calling Tyga a pedophile. We see O’Malia crying and
immediately call her money hungry, telling Tyga to wise up. If he were really
after her music, why didn’t the message contain him trying to obtain her
parents’ information? Fourteen year olds can’t sign contracts and he would know
that. So he couldn’t have been trying to do business with her.
Tyga may not be guilty, however, he
is already known for liking his girls young, so it isn’t the smartest move on
his part to slide in the DMs of another underage girl. However, in social
media’s eyes, to some of us anyway, Tyga no longer looks like a young foolish
25 year old dating an eighteen year old. He is now beginning to look like that
creepy uncle who you have to keep away from the teenagers because he’s always a
little too close to your daughter or the grown man who smiles too hard at your
baby sister when she’s at the grocery store. It just bothers me that it took a
second girl for us to want to call him out for real this time.
Very clear, organized post exposing a serious issue and helping me to understand a different culture just a little bit more. Well done!
ReplyDeleteThank you! I try my best!
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